Gifted but not called

I am realizing with the help of the Holy Spirit that being gifted and being called are two different things.

When I was in the 10th grade, I sat outside my house and thought about what I wanted to do with my life. When I was about 9, I told myself I would become a teacher. A few years after, my father sat with me one day and told me I would make a great lawyer, so I began to look into that field to see what it required. I also reminded myself that I had always wanted to be a WNBA player, the next Lisa Leslie or Candace Parker.

On this particular day, I sat conflicted and unsure of what I wanted to do. As I sat there, I began to think about the things that gave me joy, and I found that I enjoyed teaching. So I decided I would be a teacher, since then that was my plan. Go to school obtain my bachelors degree, then obtain my masters degree and ultimately obtain an PhD. I also knew that I enjoyed working with children and teaching in the school system or in a daycare would be perfect as I worked to obtain my degrees.

Fast forward to the present time, I find myself in my current job [see previous blog]. I have been asking the Lord what He wants me to learn and one of the things He brought to my attention is that I have been gifted by Him to work with children and to teach but I am not called to work with children. My calling does not stop here, my gifting has allowed me to work with children and in childcare but I have not been called to this specifically.

There is more for me, and the Lord wants me to have it, I need only to wait.

I remember when I told my best friend that I felt the Lord was calling me in a different direction, to a place that friends have joked with me about and I rejected. I told her that that very place is where I feel Him leading me, and she asked me how I felt about giving up the idea and plans I had up until this point. To my surprise I felt relieved. I felt hopeful. I felt excited for what is to come.

I thought about my current place and my feelings about potentially staying in this career field, and I realized that I was not happy. Not happy with the thought that this was it for me. That the road ended exactly where I planned it to end. In some ways there was a bitter feeling when I thought about leaving the childcare/teaching in school arena, for that is what I had been planning for and expecting, but there were more sweet feelings than bitter.

Here I am, learning that the gifts the Lord has given me do not have one specific destination. I feel I am called to teach but not in this capacity and I am okay with that.

I encourage you to think about your gifts and ask the Lord "is my current place my final place? am I using the gifts you have given me in the place you have called me" and if the answer to those questions is "no" I invite you to ask the Lord to show you where He is leading you.

I will leave us with a prayer,

Father I thank you for your Holy Spirit that speaks to me. I thank you for showing me the gifts you have given me. I thank you that you are showing me where and how my life can give you the glory. Would you open my eyes to see your guidance and truth? Would you continue to show me the gifts you have given me and how to use them? I pray that in this place of waiting and of new revelation that you would help me to let go of what I hoped for that I may receive what you have created for me. May my plans look small in the face of your mighty desires for me.

I pray all of these things in your son Jesus' name, Amen