Ecdysis (ek-dey-sis): The act of putting off, coming out of, or emerging

A few weeks ago I was spending time in prayer and I asked the Lord why I felt I was in a weird place. I asked to see if there was something I was missing. He told me something I was not expecting, He said I was molting. Followed by those words, I saw an image of a snake losing its skin. This image made what He said more clear.

Snakes lose their skin, caterpillars break from their cocoons in a process called molting or ecdysis and they become a better version of themselves. The difference between caterpillars and snakes is the way they show their growth and transformation. Caterpillars no longer look similar to worms after they come out of their cocoons, they look like completely different animals. Snakes however, still look the same and the only noticeable difference is their length.

I have been asking the Lord to change me and to make me new with the mindset of a caterpillar, asking these things with the hopes of looking completely different than how I look now.  The Lord's answer to that request was "yes" but "no" at the same time. Yes He will make me new and He will change me but no to me taking on a completely new appearance.

The Lord has created me to look and to be how I am, for His word says I am created in Him image. Me asking for him to change me and to make me new from the caterpillar perspective was me asking for Him to make me look less like Him. Imagine how that must make the Lord feel, it is equivalent to me going to my father (whom I look a lot alike) and saying, "Daddy, I don't like looking like you. I don't like people seeing me and thinking of you. I want to look different, actually, I want to look better!" How would my earthly father feel if I were to say that to him?

When the deeper meaning of what I was asking was revealed to me it broke my heart to truly see that my uncovered desire to was look less like the Lord and more like something or someone else.

Now I am here, with a deeper understanding of what it means to molt or to undergo the ecdysis process. It is to go through change without looking completely different. It is to undergo growth and have minor noticeable differences. It is to ultimately be okay with self.

As I continue to go through ecdysis, my continued prayer is for me to look more like the Lord and less like something or someone else. It is to long to look so much like the Lord that instead of running to Him and asking to turn me into a butterfly I ask for Him to make me grow taller so I can gain a better view of His image, that I may take on His strong features. My prayer is to be more welcoming of the Father who knows me better than I know myself.

I will leave us with a prayer,

Father I thank you for making me look like you. I thank you for your desire to make me look more like you each and everyday. I pray that I would surrender my desire to turn into a butterfly and would adopt the desire to look more like you while growing. I ask that you would tear down the lies I have believed that tell me it is better to look less like you and more like something or someone else. Would you heal any broken concepts I may have of you and would you mend any bent ideas of what it means to be made new? I ask for your love to consume me and for my eyes to be fixed on you and you more than anything. I ask that as you are remaking me and doing a new thing, I would enjoy the face staring back at me and the new heights I will reach with you.

I pray and ask all of these things in Jesus' name,

                                                                                Amen